This is a serious letter as your drinking is obviously a serious matter.
You are talented. Really talented. But you need to address one fact.
You have a drinking problem.
The fact you can't have just one indicates you may be an alcoholic.
They say you're on your last chance. I say that chance should be on the condition you show up to AA and take that first step.
Yours, the Kiwi public who just want to see you play.
Dear Martin Guptill,
The Cheap Seats are now officially starting you a fan club. You utterly rule.
Love,
Us
(PS, comment to join the Martin Guptill Fan Club)
[Posted on behalf of The Brat, who is locked in a tin shed with nothing but a stack of paper for company]
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